I hate yew vacum

im so tuf gois heheheh heres why first the vacum came out and i wuz like im gona stand my ground vacum. den vacum came out and i wuz like im gona bit u vacum and it kept coming at me so i barked some more. den i barked again and vacum baked up and ran awya hehehehheeh vacum is a coward gois!

phee is a phag latly gois i tryed to lay down wif him this morning and den he got up! wtf!!! phee i wen i wana cudle it mens that i wana cudle and u dont have choice in matter. next time ill just bite his jugular and hell be dyed hehehehehe. i bit him yesterday noit gois heheheh he wuz lafing buut i wuz 2 ft away from making phee dyed wif blood evrywhere but then i remember that i wouldnt be able to cudle phee in the morning so i wuz like ok phee, u can live.

ohhhhhhh dady just came home gois hehehhehehe im gonna go up on moi hind legs and kis him mmmm becuz i wuv dady and he cudles me at noit hehehehehehe. i own yew vacum ur ghey faget hehheheheh

Merry Chrismas Gois!

Hoi gois! Its chrismas! heheheheheheheh!

I waant lots of gifs for chrismas gois loik bombs and napalm hehehehhehe den i could blow neberhood up hehehehehheeh. i would be liek i got da bomb gois den the fbis liek dashie come down we hav slice meat and im like hmmmmm i think about it hoid then im like no! so den i set off weaponds and den everyfing around me blows up and i have dady to my self. the second gift i want is to have lots of guns hehehehehhe id be liek phee get me food now or ill shoot u faget! hehehehhe! and phee would be liek yes sir becuz i own phee. den ill be like ak47 fagets1 hehehehehhehehe!

also i want eighty millions possums for chrismas hehehhe den they never get worn out and i can chew all possums i want and eat dem. also i want hegehogs too for after i get toired of possum. heheheheh i can make squeeking noise wen i bite it gois! hehehehehe its fun

dey dont know it but im gonna own evryone on chrismas becuz im evil dashie. ill morph into satan face and start boiting evryone and running around wif things in my mouth. heheheheh its gonna be fun gois. den b4 new years ill be ruler of wurld so it wont matter hehehehhehe

I juked Maphee!

Hehehhehehe! today i juked maphee and it wuz great gois. first maphee wuz like dashie i want wut ur chewing an i wuz like no maphee so i ran away wif it inmy mouth and maphee tryed to grab me so i jumped out fo way n he fell over like gigantic tree heheheheh! maphee is a big dumy faget. then phee had to come out and ruin it its like wtf phee? u always ruin the fun especially wen i hav something in my mouth n i wana chew it. u suk phee!

ohhhh im laying wif daddy right now and im cudling him. i liked his face to show how much i wuv him gois hehhehehehe then i went under covers and wuz like ohhhhhh hoi dady! i own u gois n i culd out juke all of u becuz ur all big dumb humans hhehehehehe!

I'm toier'd gois

Hoi gois! Dashie tired tonite. Im gona lay with dady and push mommy out of the wai becuz im dashie and im special biotches! heehehehehehehe! i pwn evry one else so me and dady are gonna cuddle tonight. Tonite i wuz on my back and dady was petting my belly and i wuz like 'ohhhhhh dady hehehehe!' then phee and maphee came and i wuz like 'wtf fagets1!!!" so i got up and wuz like i wana go out phee and he wouldnt put meout so i wuz like phee im gona slit ur thorat in your sleep.
den he got scared of my menacing snarl so he put my out and wen he wanted me to come in i wuz like 'no!" so i got bad face and started to bark at evryone in the neborhood to show my statis as dominant ogre. im bad gois! phee got me in with chicken treat and i wuz like mmmmmm fank yew phee but i still own u and this is just buying u more time to live.
den i went back and cudled daddy. mmmmm! i wuv u daddy hehehehehe! i cuddle phee int he morning becuz hes fat and his blubber keeps me warm after i come in from outside. den he starts kicking me and im like wtf phee! matt wont let me in his room becuz da door is closed lololol wat a fag. i own u maphee! u dont know it but one of these days ill bite ur neck ill have u cornered in hall and ill say a clever linea nd then bite u faget! hehehheheehhe!

im toiered gois! im gonna go lay down wif daddy and den wake phee up at 12 tonite hehehehehehe!

I owned phee tonight gois

heheheheheheh! i owned phee! it wuz great gois. first i wuz about to come in but i saw phee at door and i was like 'fu phee im too good to be let in by u' so i ran out. den he came to get me and i was like 'get out here and grab me btich. so then phee tried to get me in w/ food and i was like heheheheheh ur a faget phee! first he tried twizlers then he tryed pretzel and none worked becuz im dominant ogre and phees an idiot heheheheh!
then i got cold so i came in only to maphee becuz he's a step above inferior phee so i ran and bit possum. then i wuz like daddddddy! so i ran to bed and licked dady gois hehehehhe!

my goals 4 da rest of year!

hoi! i got goals for rest of year gois first im gona get ornements off tree and get dem in my mowth. i can see it now. first i bat ornement off tree and im liek hehehehehehE! i grab it in my mouth then i run around with it and phee's like 'drop it dashie!' im like 'fu phee!' then maphee comes to try to get it too. first im like 'ok ill give it back' then im like nope fagets heheheheh so i run around with it and do masive jukes and dey cant catch me the weak humans. i wuld have bad face then i do a juke and maphee falls over and is dyed. then phees like 'please sir, give it back' and im like 'no biotch, but bow to me and ill spare u' and he bows hehehehehehhe! den i dominate him and forgive him but he has to give me 2 peices of slice meat to make up for it.

gaol 1: get ornement off tree

den my 2nd goal is to rip da second wing of of duky by end of year. ill be like heheheheh i did it then id swallow duky wing and it wuld be yummy. mmmm duky!

goal 2: bit duky wing

heheheh my fird gaol is to get twizler by end of year. mmmmm dos r good gois did u ever have dos? i wuv twizler and i had dem once but i got sick becuz of phee so i through them up. i was like 'wtf phee?' wen i get dem again il enjoy them ill be like 'mmmmmm these are good' and il have hapy ogre face.

goal 3; get twizlers heheheheh!

moi finle goal is to becum supreeme leder of family but maybe eqaul to dady. den me and dady will share power and itl be fun illhave da other humans do jobs like cleening the dirt off me but dey already do dat so im almost there gois heheheheheheheh!

gaol 4: own evryone hehehehehehehhehehehehe!

ur ghey snowplow!

Hehhehehehe! Snow plow just went by and I wuz like heheheheheh im gona bite u snowpolow hehhehehehehe! then snow plow went away and i was liek wtf snow plow it wuz becuz my snarl it went away. then i had urge to bit phee so i was like 'come here phee' and i grabbed possum and ran around and phee was plaing on tv and i was like "wtf phee! get of faget!" so then i ran and bit his neck and i was like 'im gona kill u phee!' but he started rubing my belly.

Then I was like 'hoi dady!" when dady came home and i went on hind legs and had to put dominant paw out becuz i own you dady! then i was like go away phee when he came to pet me becuz phee is retard. im gona wake him up @ 12 tonite gois becuz its funny to see his reaction. hes like 'dashie' and im like 'hehehehehe! get up bitch!' my bark is scary is like 'roaaaar' like a lion gois! exsept i own lion and i bite them hehehehehe! then snow plow came back and i was liek 'wtf?' so i ran outside and tried to bite it but was on chain. ur lucky snow plow! im gona bite your neck faget!!!!

wen im leder of the wurld there wont be snow plows hehehehehehe becuz ill dominate them and send them to concentration camps. then theyll do work for me becuz i own them. then ill be like 'run over phee snow plow' and it be like 'yes sir dashie!' and it runs over phee multiple times wile i watch and im like 'yay!' den dady walks in and's like 'dashie i wuv you, ur all i would ever put my attention on come heer so i can rub ur belly!' then i get lots of chicken treats and slice meat wile im executting everyone who doesnt obey me gois! hehehehhehehehehe! bitches!

I'm gona bite you gois!

Hoi gois! I'm gonna bite yuo becuz im dashie! hehehehehehehe!

today i was at home and i wnet to sleep and momma wasnt here. but then i looked and moma was here. lol! i was like wow hi momma! and she wouldn't take me for walk so i was like "wtf!" then i saw chrismas tree up and was like omg! im gonna bite those bulbs gois! so i went upt here and went for bulb with my dominant paw and got one in my mouth. i was like "heheheheheh! im biting it" and i ran around with it in my moth for eevar! then moma was like drop it dashie and i was like no! so i ran under back and bit into it and it hoit my teeth so i was like "ohhhhh....."

then i got camel face and went and layed down next to moma and was like "im toierd momma" so she pet my belly and i was like "im gona blow this place up" but she didnt say anything. so i ran and bit something with bad face and bit the couch and she got mad. lol! i want dady to come home becuz he gives me sliced meat and im like fank yew dady.

dont come near my house gois becuz im dashie and im gona bite you hehehheeheh! ur all retard so dont come here or dye. hehehehehehehe! bow down to me when i get dominant cowboy snarl or ill come over there and take bite out of your jugular! heheheheheh i also chase cars as they go by because they fink they can get away but im dashie and i can run 1000000 miles per hour heheheheheheheh!

You suck phee!

Today I threw posum at daddy and he didnt want to pway. so i took possum to momma and she didnt want to play either and told me to go away and i was like "awwww momma! so i roled on my back and dey peted my belly. den dady came in and peted my belly too and i was like 'yay!" then i was like like omg its snowy outside so i was like "hoi daddy! lets go out" but he didnt let me out so i was like "outside! now! BARK" he was afwaid of my schnarl becuze im so tuff and then i was like daddy stay out with me at door but then he threw chicken treat out and i was like yay!

arfter that i came in from cold snow and was like i wanna play daddy but he wanted to watch tv. i grabed hedgehog in my mouth and through it at him and he didnt play so i got snarl but ended up on dadys lap being peted by him with spoiled snarl. phee sucks becuz he plais with me but now hes not here and its like "wtf phee!" im gonna bite him when he gets back gois hehehehehehhehe! you suck phee! i own you! im gona dominate you wen u get bak becuz i own you and im gonna bite your neck phee! hehehehehehe!

Chronicles of Dashie

Hoi gois! I'm dashie! I wuz just siting on daddy and he wuz rubing my neck. ohhhhhhh! I was toyred! then i got a spoiled face becuase im daddis litle ogre. then phee walked in and ruined the mood. i was like gethim daddy! but nothing happened. then i was like "f u phee!! and he came over and kissed my face. i pulled my face away becuz im dominant i cant have phee kissing my face because i own him! so i was like "get off phee!" and he walked away from chair and sat on couch. then i started licking daddies face becuz i wuv. ohhhhh daddy! i wuv!

then phee came over again and peted me and i was like "wtf!" but then i jumped down and bit possum.

Hoi Gois!

Hoi Gois! I'm Dashie! Today I just atacked my 1st person outside becuz he was on my property! It wasnt my falt but he made me do it! Heres wat hapened. 1st, he came onto my proprety and tryed to put male down. My slaves call him the male man. I atacked him and bit his neck! Hehehehehehehehehe!

Heres a litle abowt myself. My names Dashie and im a peekinese rodeesan ridgebak beegle mix. dat meens im mean and will bite you if you come onto my porperty. i like to bark @ ppl as dey walk by becuze im so tough and theyre litle and theyre inferior to me. My plans are to dominate the wurld wen i becume supreame dictator of the united states and take over the wurld. Phee will bow down 2 me and then hell be my water boy and fetch me food.

bow down to dash the great bithces.